Just two minutes....
While reading an email sent by our home supervisor at our CPA (Child Placement Agency), I was devastated. Two minutes in, my head spun and my demeanor changed from carefree to disappointed. She had gone to court on a case involving two of our foster children. What was supposed to be a routine court appearance turned into more than what was expected. Usually, the three month review is quick and typical; an overview from child’s caseworker on how the child is doing in placement and quick over view of school and extra activities. A report from bio-parents case manager and the child’s attorney on the progress of bio-parents treatment plan and child's supervised visits.
This is how life often is in fostering—the children’s situation can change in an instant.
A sign hanging in my home reads, ‘When life gets too difficult to stand, kneel’. I found myself doing just that this past Friday.
I was preparing for 40 people to come to a fun-filled party at the ranch when I received that email. How was I going to ‘get it together’ for the sake of everyone else? I needed to dig deep and find the truth in this new situation. I heard a lecture by *Beth Moore years ago. In her teaching, she gave a mnemonic of
FEAR—“False Evidence Appearing Real”.
This has stuck with me all these years and allows me to catch myself when I am distressed.
I have learned over the years that life is full of disappointment and sadness. I can allow it to consume me and render me useless, or I can choose to press one and allow my faith to lead me. I choose the latter as God will guide my steps.
This story has just begun. I will continue to update as it unfolds.
1. *Beth Moore, Breaking Free, 1999
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